A rough day

We experienced some unavoidable triggers over the previous days but no more than usual.

In the morning, a neighbour had a friend visiting with a dog. George could hear and smell the dog and was on high alert. I think some of the behaviour may have been frustrated greeter rather than fear but it's hard to tell.

He seemed to settle after a while and was resting quite well.

I'd had a rough week at work and really wanted to get out of the house for a walk. We drove to a relatively quiet spot. George normally does well there. We usually do see people and dogs at a distance but he manages it.

As soon as we left the house George was on very high alert. The start of the walk was a bit crazy. His over-excitement/over-stimulation meant he was darting around all over the place and crazy pulling on the lead.

After allowing some sniffing time and just as he was beginning to calm a little, some people came up the path. We quickly moved away and he growled.

Shortly after, some people with a dog came into view. It was very hard to increase the distance as George was fixated and not listening/responding to treats. Cue extreme barking and lunging.

We changed our path and walked for a little while. I saw the other dog leaving and headed back.

It was a hot day and I wanted George to have a paddle at the little beach - something he really enjoys and we usually have it to ourselves.

Unfortunately another dog and owner came into view. Cue barking and lunging.

I decided we had to call it a day.

We saw a man in the distance on the way back to the car and George reacted badly again.

When we got back, we ran into the neighbours. Of course. George was reacting extremely, one of the kids was screaming...it was a lot.

I got in the front door and burst into tears. I don't cry often. I'm normally pretty stoic and positive but it felt pretty overwhelming on that day.

I'm aware that other stresses (likely redundancies at work) will be contributing to my lower resilience. 

It feels like I have poured so much love, time, energy, and money into this issue with little to show for it.

I have rearranged my entire life to ensure George is never left alone. I am struggling with being trapped in the house apart from work and when I do try to go out, it's embarrassing and exhausting.

I just wanted to go for a simple walk. I was so frustrated and upset.

I know it's not his fault but I feel so sad he isn't able to navigate life like other dogs. I know my stress makes it worse but it's exhausting constantly trying to control your mood.

George was unsettled and barked throughout the evening which was tough.

I decided the next day we would just have to stay in the house. Enrichment activities are challenging at the moment as he's not interested in food. But we both needed to rest and decompress.

I tried to have a break from the reactive dog world and not spend so much of my free time reading about training techniques and others' experiences.

I spoke with a couple of very supportive friends. George rested well.

We have a follow up appointment with the vet behaviourist coming up which is excellent timing. I don't think the meds are supporting George in the same way as previously. He reacts instantly even when the trigger is barely visible. I also want to get him a full health check with the vet under sedation.

Once I reflected on the day, I realised there were things I could have done differently. I think I realised them at the time.

With the dog next door unsettling George in the morning, perhaps it should have been an at home day. But I really felt I needed to get out of the house.

When he saw the first trigger and he reacted, we should have called it a day. But it's such a stress to leave the house, I didn't want to go home after 5 minutes.

I wanted George to have a paddle but I shouldn't have persevered and exposed George to more triggers.

Sometimes even when you know what the right thing to do is, actually doing it is hard!

We've got a challenging week coming up - the groomers and the VB. We will just have to steel ourselves and get through it. And have hope that we've just got to keep trying.